It works every time.
Have you ever sat across from someone in a meeting, sizing them up, trying to figure out just how smart they really are? Maybe it’s a job interview, a first date, or that new colleague who seems a little too quiet for comfort. We’ve all been there, haven’t we?
Here’s the thing: you’re doing it all wrong.
Let me tell you about the day I learned this lesson the hard way. I was five years old, crying over an IQ test that asked me to “Circle the picture that looks most like a lamp.” The options are a desk, a bed, a couch, and a lamp.
My five-year-old brain couldn’t process it. If one of the pictures was a lamp, why were they asking which one looked like a lamp? The whole test felt like a cruel joke, open to endless interpretations. I never finished it.
The school wanted to put me in special education. My parents were mortified.
We’re Obsessed with Looking Smart
You’ll be surprised how much this obsession has taken over our culture. Everyone needs to feel like the genius in the room these days. Have you noticed how politicians share memes about complex medical topics and tell people to “do their own research”? How millions think someone’s smart just because they wear tweed and confirm their biases?
We’ve commodified intelligence like it’s the latest tech gadget.
The key is this: we’ve confused wealth with brains, confidence with competence, and noise with knowledge. Think about it—when you hear “genius,” who comes to mind? Probably Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos, right? But what about the scientists who created the mRNA vaccines saving lives right now? Or Jonas Salk, who gave away the polio vaccine for free?
Most actual geniuses died broke. That’s not exactly headline material.
The Problem with Quick Intelligence Tests
Here’s what really makes the difference between authentic intelligence assessment and the nonsense we usually rely on: every measure we have is biased and superficial.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking those viral “10 Signs You’re a Genius” articles mean anything. Sure, they feel good—we love reading about how our quirky habits prove we’re brilliant. But can you really trust a checklist to measure something as complex as human intelligence?
The truth is, anyone can look smart if they know the current trends. Quiet people are considered intelligent now? Great—just shut up in meetings and let everyone assume you’re deep. Unless you’re a woman, of course. Then you’re just “not contributing.”
We’ve Gendered Intelligence (And It’s Ridiculous)
Let me ask you something: how many times do you see “genius” next to women’s names compared to men’s?
Not often, right?
The word itself is gendered. We all know what Einstein looks like, but do you know Lise Meitner? She discovered nuclear fission, but her male colleague got the Nobel Prize. The philosophical giants who shaped our thinking about intelligence—Kant, Aristotle—thought women were barely capable of rational thought.
Which brings us to the real problem: our intelligence measures are riddled with centuries of bias. IQ tests, college admissions, interview puzzles—it’s all built on shaky ground.
The Simple Truth About Measuring Intelligence
If you’re looking for the best way to see how smart someone really is, here’s an approach that won’t fail you:
Stop judging them.
That’s it. That’s the whole strategy.
As a teacher, I’ve used this method for over a decade. Give people a chance to show you their intelligence on their own terms, not yours. Stop trying to be clever with trick questions or five-minute assessments.
Remember what we talked about earlier—that five-year-old who couldn’t finish an IQ test? By fourteen, I was in the gifted program. The difference wasn’t that I got smarter overnight. The difference was how I was measured.
What Really Works
You want actionable advice? Here’s what you can do right now:
If you’re hiring someone: Look at their actual qualifications. Ask real questions about their experience. Give them a trial period where they can demonstrate their abilities naturally.
If you’re trying to understand a colleague: Listen to how they solve problems over time. Watch how they handle challenges. Notice what they contribute when they’re comfortable.
If you’re assessing anyone’s intelligence: Give them space to surprise you. Intelligence comes in forms you might not recognize immediately.
The key is patience. You’re never going to figure out how smart someone is in five or twenty minutes. It takes time to see how someone thinks, creates, and contributes.
Here’s the Really Interesting Part
What would you do if you stopped trying so hard to prove your own intelligence? What if you stopped trying to quickly categorize others?
You might discover that the quiet person in your meetings has brilliant insights they’re waiting to share. You might find that the colleague who doesn’t use big words actually understands the concepts better than anyone else in the room.
The real measure of intelligence isn’t how quickly someone can solve your puzzle—it’s how they approach problems, learn from mistakes, and contribute to solutions over time.
Who hasn’t felt frustrated by someone judging their intelligence based on a first impression or a single interaction? Don’t be that person for someone else.
Intelligence is complex, culturally situated, and beautifully diverse. The smartest thing you can do is recognize that your quick assessment probably says more about your biases than their abilities.
Give people the chance to show you how brilliant they are. You’ll be amazed by what you discover when you stop trying to be the smartest person in the room and start recognizing the intelligence that’s already there.
